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| Courtesy Matthew Adams |
So, conservative game blogger Tom Hatfield ( @wordmercenary on twitter ) wrote a lot of things that aren't true.
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| He looks familiar, right? |
Why didn't an actual news site take your story, oh Mercenary? Probably because ofall the ways you fucked it up. Let's count them--but, in counting them, let's also take this opportunity to look back at a great many years of posts in D&D With Porn Stars that Tom The Word Mercenary clearly did not.
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Why This A Win-Win For You, Reader
If you've read all of the posts from this blog I'm linking to below, you already know Tom the Word Mercenary is talking from deep betwixt the pressing and fleshy sanctum of his or some friend's butt--and you can skip this post entirely. Go grab some tables off the Dozen.
If you haven't, it's almost as if these links to old but relevant posts are me writing a whole bunch of new posts about something other than embarrassing the hell out of a terrible writer today and you get to read it.
So, let's romp!
Special Note For RPGnet: Now the biggest complaint against me is that I made a list of people who endorsed a lie about rape threats. The stupid theory is that I did this to shame, embarrass or bully people into rescinding their endorsement. I had no such hopes: I did it to warn my friends that nobody on that list should be trusted because they just will endorse shit without evidence.
Let's watch Tom the Word Mercenary turn this into a conspiracy...
It starts with a simple fact-checking embarassment I would've gotten fired for back when I was an unpaid intern:
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| Dude. Seriously. |
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| (4e stands for "Fourth Edition". Like, of D&D. Also a big 5e fan--having worked on it. Those are the two newest editions which, to be fair, Tom The Word Mercenary may not have known since he apparently doesn't know about Google.) |
#3 "Zak S is famous for two things: Playing D&D with pornstars, both on his blog and for a little while in a web series for the Escapist, and being banned from half the major RPG communities on the net for derailing any and all discussion about diversity and discrimination."
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| Click to enlarge the actual awesome thing I said that got me banned from RPGnet |
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| …and I got banned from Story-Games for pointing our Wundergeek was a repulsive bigot |
#4 "Zak...spends all his time derailing conversations on sexism"
#5 "...defending sexists…."
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| STOP LAUGHING ALL OF YOU I AM YOUR DUNGEON MASTER!!! |
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| "Whatever could be the matter with this door?" said Alice. "It is being held shut by Zak. He has no other entertainments." said the Mercenary "Wait, the Zak that drew me?" said Alice "Uhh…" |
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| Click to enlarge the extent of Tom Hatfield's failure. And get a preview of Red & Pleasant Land. |
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| This is an unrelated bat picture from a book I'm doing. |
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| So: anyone but Zak stepping up to defend Zak is "harassment". |
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| Keeping score? Obscure + lying: not harassment. Famous+ typing true things: harassment. Famous+typing fake things: not harassment. |
#8 "What they do is point out targets and refuse to admonish their fans when they step over the line."
#9 "...it the choice of victim that is the most telling. These attacks nearly alwaystarget women and LGTBQ individuals…"
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| Targeting for hugs, maybe? |
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| The sole documented incident of Zak S harassing a trans person |
#10 "...his girlfriend attempted to out a trans designer…"
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| "The years of trolling I did before I changed my screen-name don't count!" |
#11 "...Zak’s business model revolves around publically being a jerk. He is, quite literally, a career bully…"
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| …also a porn actor, but I figured that was implied. And it is the Post so, y'know…. |
#12 "...Zak was publicly speaking on Mearls’ behalf,…"
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| Do you see "On behalf of Mike Mearls?" I don't see that. Tom The Word Mercenary, do you see that? Tom The Word mercenary what are you on? Are there secret drugs given only to Mercenaries? |
#13 "...almosteverywoman, personofcolour or LGTBQindividualseemstohavehad a run in with Zak or Pundit…"
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| Maybe eating a sandwich before we take Mandy her new wheelchair is a "run-in"? I dunno, ask Tom The Word Mercenary. |
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| In 2013 I discovered the secret best way to destroy homosexuals is to help them snuggle. |
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| Soon, my pet… |
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| ProTip: Best way to keep women out of the RPG hobby is to invite any woman reading it to take over your blog. Three times. The fourth time, they will turn into an apple tree and furnish only bitter fruit. |
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I do apologize for how gauche it is to trot out the LGBT and POC players in your game group to defend yourself against hating them, but there's only one person I've personally introduced to D&D who isn't LGBT or a POC or both so, y'know, I have nobody else to trot out.
Like seriously: what are you supposed to do when you're accused of being racist by a group, dozens-strong, that has less people of color in it than your actual home game group (5)?
Maybe I just hate secretly everyone. Except Adam, the white guy who plays a wizard.
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| (Meet me behind the boathouse Adam.) |
And, in the end you may be wondering, what exactly do Tom the Word Mercenary and the Something Awful goons and monocle-droppers he sourced his article from have on me after 3 weeks of looking for dirt?
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Y'know what'll be cited as "evidence" of harassment? This. The fact that I took Tom the Word Mercenary's public post and publicly pointed out the public mistakes he made publicly. Which is like what Tom did to me, only true and documented with links quotes and pictures to back it up.
When people claim to be "victims of harassment" that's usually what they mean: "Zak typing my name because and after I typed his name".
And what, pray tell, do we have on Tom The Word Mercenaries friends? Well this dork stalking Kiel, for instance...
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| Empathy means never asking if maybe you're just one of the statistically inevitable percentage of trolling dickwheels 6 years of talking about D&D and pornography simultaneously will stir up. |
Luckily Tom the Word Mercenary is not the world's sole source of news. Here are some people who actually did their homework before posting it where people could read it:
Janis Lily
and
Shea Kauffman on how Tom the Mercenary is weaponizing marginalized people...
Jeff Rients
Annah Madrinan (now getting mansplained at by some pro-Tom Hatfield douche)
Bleeding Cool
Rob Monroe
Kat Fisher
Stacey Dellorfano
James Raggi
Ms Kamikaze Kitten
Trollsmyth
Alex Mayo
Tom K
Andrew Tran at 8cn.tv
Jeff Russell
Wild Die
Patrick Stuart
Gary Mengle
Kirin Robinson
Doug Anderson
"Rusty"Pierce
Noisms
John Austin
Richard G like whoa
Seebs like triple whoa
And, as always, actualreal journalist and fellow thief, Molly Crabapple:
You want the truth? Right there. The whole mess.
UPDATE!
Goalpost-shifting scoreboard so far--
Start:
-Zak is a bigot and harasses all LGBTS and POCs in the hobby
(disproved, moved to…)
-Zak is not a bigot but harasses all LGBTS and POCs in the hobby
(disproved, moved to…)
-Zak harasses like maybe some LGBTs and POCs in the hobby
(disproved, moved to…)
-Zak incites people to harass some LGBTSs and POCs in the hobby
(unproved, moved to…)
-Zak quotes some LGBTs and POCs in the hobby which makes other people harass them
(unproved, moved to…)
-Zak quotes some LGBTs and POCs in the hobby which might've made some other people harass them
(unproved, moved to…)
-Zak quotes people who troll and attack him and insults them which might've made some other people harass the trolls and never said don't do that
(disproved, moved to…)
-Zak quotes people who troll and attack him and insults them….aaaand that's unprofessional
(vague, moved to…)
-Zak treats people who claim to be professional game designers who attack him out of nowhere better than they treat him but...that's still unprofessional because…ummm…because…..
(ineffective, moved to)
-Zak doesn't care about trolls' feelings
BINGO.
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